Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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