It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
