You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize