His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
