Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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