Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
