ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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