why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
