Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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