MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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