some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
