I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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