There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
