My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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