let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
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