I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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