with your own penis?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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