Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
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