ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
