you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
