Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
