what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Quick, to the slutcave!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize