OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
