Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
