You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize