But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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