Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
