He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
