i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I think my moral compass just broke
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