I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
