Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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