Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
