what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
