I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
id be glad to
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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