Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Randomize
