do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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