Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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