hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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