OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
you would pick up someone in the library
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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