Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.

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(205): View more from Alabama

i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.

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(323): View more from California

She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.

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(641): View more from Iowa

Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.

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(503): View more from Oregon

She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.

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(410): View more from Maryland

he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that

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(480): View more from Arizona

Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?

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