Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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