You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize