Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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