i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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