There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
