Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
