Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Randomize
