try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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