North Korea, Best Korea!
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
