We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
