Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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