Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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