Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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