I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
